Saturday, April 6, 2013

About A Zipper and Barter

So there I was at work, minding my own business when suddenly I was asked "You are a seamstress, are you not?" 

 I reply, "Not really.  I can sew, but am not very good."  

"Good," says the Asker, "I have a jacket that needs a new zipper."

"Ohhhh, well So-n-So is far better with a machine than I am, have you asked her?"

"Yes and she flat out refused saying something about despising anything zipper." 

"Well, I suppose I could try..."

"What do you charge for this?"  The Asker is beside herself, eyes sparkling, doing the pee pee dance because she has found someone to replace a zipper!

My first desire was to tell her she might not want to pay at all when I get done with the jacket, but I kept my wits about me and said, "Well, how about barter?"  I absolutely LOVE barter.

"Okay!  But how do you judge what is acceptable barter?" The Asker is now worried.

"I'm sure you will think of something," I say as I accept the bag holding the jacket with naughty zipper.  I know better....zippers are the Devil's Work and no good comes from trying to replace them!

I get the jacket home and pull out my ripper (according to So-n-So it is actually called a "bitch" because if you have to use this thing, whatever you are ripping is a bitch to rip) and begin carefully taking out the old zipper.  Little at a time so as not to rip the fabric of the jacket.....

MEANWHILE, back at work.....

I come into work one morning and sit down at my desk, pull out my keyboard and there is a box sitting there that says "Open Me".  I open it and there is a GREEN TROLL!!!  I'm very excited because I think they are cute and fun to take pictures of (yes, I'm a dork).  No note, no reference to who left it...just the troll.

I spent quite a bit of time that day asking people if this was their fault.  I'm thinking it was more fun to see the look of confusion in their eyes.  I mean, how many people will walk right up to you and say "DID YOU DO THIS????"  I just figured it would be easier to glean the guilty party using this method than being casual about it.  

I did not find out who it was that day, or the rest of that week.

So, a week goes by and The Asker gently inquires about the jacket.  I let her know that the second side is being more difficult to rip than the first side and I really didn't want to rip the fabric (all true).  What I omitted was how I was terrified of doing some terribly irreparable damage and the evil zipper was winning.

Yesterday I was suffering from a monstrous headache and decide I must have some tea immediately, reached for my cup and wrapped in bubble wrap, stuffed in my tea cup was....

 Another Troll!!! I love the whole gift giving and the gifts being trolls, but the MYSTERY was the part I needed to fix immediately.

Tea cup in hand I go to the break room to make a cup and there is The Asker and another co-worker yakking away.  I casually mention that I have been surprised again by another troll and The Asker has GUILTY EYES.

I make my tea and say no more.  I wait.  A little while later I approach The Asker and say, "Do you, perchance, know anything about these trolls at my desk?"

With ever widening GUILTY eyes, she says, "I don't know what you are talking about! I'm sure it's someone very nice, I admit to nothing."  

THAT mystery solved, it then occurred to me that she had found her way of feeling satisfied about the barter (I am loving her creative way of doing it as well) and I'd better finish up the jacket before her son grows too big for it!

I finally managed to get the rest of the zipper ripped away, and while I'm doing this I keep finding crushed up pine cone debris on my lap and my desk.  Turns out there were three pine cones in the right hand pocket.

The other pocket had a Transformer.  The hidden pocket had 31 cents.

I nod in approval.  Young boys SHOULD have those very things in their pockets!

So here I am, getting ready to sew the new zipper on TODAY.  I just hope it turns out lovely and not ridiculous.  I will share that finished zipper in the next posting, or a news article about mad woman throwing sewing machine out window and killing neighbors dog.  We shall see.

Until next time.....


  1. Mystery solved but..... didn't you get a surprise rainbow haired one a while ago too. And I admire your dedication with the zipper, they are evil things.

    1. Sadly the zipper isn't my main issue's my dang sewing machine!!! I'm thinking I might have to break down and get a new one :(

      And Yes, I did get Rainbow in the mail awhile ago, but that one wasn't a secret :D

  2. Oh goodness! You are a braver woman than me! I either take the coat to a specialist who does these things (we have 2 shops in town that do this) or throw it away if it's almost the wrong size for said child. I never, ever accept zipper work from others as it's not worth my sanity to do so hehe.

    1. I agree with you, but I've started it and I'm going to finish it...or have a bonfire!!